


The Turtle Mouth Fic

by klanceft



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Horrifying, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Should i do more?, This Is Why Everyone Hates The Phandom, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-23
Updated: 2017-07-23
Packaged: 2018-12-05 20:28:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11585595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/klanceft/pseuds/klanceft
Summary: Dan decides to have a fun night in bed with Phil, a hammer, and a turtle.





	The Turtle Mouth Fic

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE DON'T READ IF YOU ARE EASILY DISTURBED MY FRIEND PROOF-READ AND HE PUKED

“Ewwww Dan look at what a fan sent me!” 

 

I call out across the apartment. I wait a second, and sure enough I hear the sounds of Dan's feet moving over to me. He puts his hands on my shoulders and places a kiss on my head. 

 

“Show me” I angle my laptop towards him, and show him the picture of the inside of a turtle's mouth.

 

 

“@3hourbreakfasts sent it to me” I look up at him, searching for a reaction. Usually, he would yell dramatically and curse or something similar. But this time he kinda just sat there, staring at the screen with his face still buried in my hair. ‘Dan?’ I prompted him, ‘You alright?” I turned around to face him.

 

“Yeah… um, I just need to run out to get some medicine, stay put alright?” I shut my laptop and stood up. 

 

“Okay, can you pick me up a coffee? We ran out of the instant stuff on Tuesday.” Dan stared at me for a little longer than what I felt comfortable with, before shaking his head. 

 

“Sorry, yes, I'll get you some” he turned around quickly and rushed out of the room. I sat down and picked up my laptop while hearing the door open and shut. Why was dan acting so weird and spaced out? I put it out of my mind, and went back to Twitter. I replied to a few more people, then decided to just watch Steven Universe. Soon enough though, I dozed off.

 

I woke with a jolt, the slam of the front door scaring me awake. I rubbed my eyes, and made my way to the entrance to greet Dan. I turned the corner, and Dan whipped around to face me. He had a huge grin on his face. 

 

“Dan, why are you acting so strange?” I said with a sigh. He reaches down and I notice that there was a large item covered with a sheet. He pulls the sheet off to reveal a very large turtle inside of a cage. My eyes widen “Aww he's so cute!” I bend down to look at it a bit closer. “Although you should have asked me before getting him, I don't know if we will be able to look after a turtle” I chuckle. 

 

“You won't have to look after him for long” he muttered under his breath, I don't think that he knew i heard him. I eyed him a bit strangely, but stood up again. 

 

“Did you get me my coffee?” He nodded and handed it to me. “Thanks Dan, I was watching Steven Universe, wanna join me?” 

 

He nodded again and stepped around the turtle's cage carefully. I grabbed his hand and led him to the living room. We sit down, and start watching. He pulls me into his lap, and I fall asleep in his arms.

 

I wake up fast, the room is freezing. I try to rub my eyes, but I can't. My hands are tied behind my back. I look around, and realize that i am naked on my and Dan's bed. 

 

“Hello? Dan?” I call out. It's dark in the room, how long was I asleep for? My head snaps to the door when it opens. I see dan standing there with the cage in his arms. “Dan why am I tied up here?” He just chuckles, and walks in. He closes the door behind him. 

 

“Phil, this is Simon” he faces away from me as he takes his clothes off. 

 

“Yes, I have met him. Why am I naked? Please answer my questions Dan” Ii say, panic starting to seep into my words. He ignores me. “Please let this be a dream” I mutter and I shut my eyes. 

 

“Don't you dare fall asleep, the sleeping drug has lasted way too long and I have had to wait” He turns around, frustrated and with only his boxers on. I can see a very large bulge in them. He quickly walks over to me and lays his body on me. He licks my face then kisses me harshly. He stood back up and let Simon out of his cage. He placed him on the bed and ran over to the bedside table, and pulled out a hammer. My eyes widened in fear. 

 

“D-Dan what are you going to do with that” He maintains eye contact with me as he slams the hammer into Simon's shell. He threw the hammer aside, and pulled a chunk of the shell off and pulled off his boxers. I watched in horror as he inserted his very hard member into the hole, moaning. Tears are streaming down my face, i cannot believe this isn't a dream. 

 

I don't want to admit it, but seeing dan thrust into the turtle's back is starting to turn me on. He stops, and slowly pulls out of the turtle. It seems to be asleep, but i think it's waking up. Dan lifts up the turtle and places it between my legs. 

 

“Oh god dan, what the fuck is happening? Please think of your actions” he just presses his fingers into the sides of the turtle's mouth, and it pops open. He grabs my dick, and shoves it into the turtle's mouth. I feel the spikes of the mouth rub up and down my member, and a small moan escapes from my lips. Dan smiles and starts to go a bit faster. I look down and see the turtle start to blink and twitch. Dan pushes me deeper into it and lets go of the turtle's mouth. It snaps down hard, and i scream in agony. 

 

“Shhhh” he places a finger on my lips, then replaces it with his lips. He pulls away. “God Phil you are so beautiful.” I could barely hear his words, i was in the most unbearable pain. He pulled the turtle away and I looked down hesitantly, to see that my dick was gone. I looked up in panic to see dan pulling my penis from the turtle's mouth. 

 

He set the turtle and my dick aside, and started to kiss my thighs. He slowly made his way to my wound, and brushed his hair out of his face. He stared me right in the eye, and licked the spot where my dick used to be. 

 

I immediately screamed, louder than i ever have. God, the pain is unbelievable. He licked up the blood, and immediately more poured out. He stuck his finger in the hole, covering it with blood, and he stuck it in my mouth without warning. I gagged, then he pulled away and grabbed my penis. 

 

He lay down in front of me, and coated it in my blood. He stuck it in his ass, and began to moan loudly. He thrusted it in an out of him, using it as a dildo. It turned me on even more, which was a very strange feeling to have without an erection. Very quickly, he came. 

 

He wiped up the white substance with two fingers, and stuck it into my bloody hole. I hissed in pain and he started to kiss me again. Once he was hard again, he lifted my hips up and started to thrust into me. 

 

My head fell back and I moaned loudly. My walls ached because the only lube was my blood. The pain slowly turned into pleasure, and i orgasmed. Dan went for a few more seconds before i felt myself be filled with warm. 

 

He slowly pulled out and kissed me softly once again.

 

“Dan why?” i cried against his mouth. He sighed.

 

“Phil, this night has been a dream come true” he layed down beside me. “I love you so much,” he said. I looked down at him as I slowly bled out. 

 

“I love you too Dan” I managed to croak out. The world started to fade from view, and I knew I was dying. That was definite. I felt myself drifting off, Dan’s embrace comforting me for the last time. 

 

At least I had made Dan happy.

**Author's Note:**

> I ate a bagel while writing this.


End file.
